[ ![][2]][2] Driven by a rising number of complaints about immodesty in public spaces, a number of B’nai Brak firms have launched competing lines of mechitzahs. “People want to feel as safe from immodesty outside of shul as they do inside,” said Shalom Shalomov of SegReg8. “Our micro mechitzahs can be used at the beach,…
[ ![][2]][2] MITZPE HILA, ISRAEL —The parents of recently released Israeli solider Gilad Shalit say that, while they are pleased and relieved to have their son back home, it hasn’t all been smooth sailing. “I would have thought that mounting an international publicity campaign for five years might be worth a little gratitude, a little…
[ ![][2]][2] NEW YORK — The competitive demolition community is in an uproar after the urine sample of Samson “The Danite” Zoraker tested positive for performance enhancing substances this weekend. “I’m totally innocent,” Samson claimed on Monday at a press conference. “I’ve never used any controlled substances, except for my hair.” Jewish slugger and National…
[ ![][2]][2] If you’re a Jewish parent like me, you always dread December. There’s the relentless onslaught of Christmas carols and decorations. The perpetual question of, “Do I try to compete and distort Hanukkah, or honor the holiday but nonpluss my kids?” And, worst of all for a Jew, there’s all that wintertime indoor-heat chafing….
[ ![][2]][2] Organic food stores, children’s book publishers, LGBT groups and leprechauns have been thrown into turmoil by the discovery by Noah Obadiah, a professor at the Technion in Haifa, of an extra color in the rainbow. Although he discovered the color nestling between blue and indigo several months ago, he was waiting for the…
[ ![][2]][2] LOS ANGELES — It appears that years of unflagging effort, dire warnings and sanctions may all have been for naught. Hollywood insiders are warning that the Islamic Republic of Iran has acquired both the materials and technological wherewithal to launch a motion picture guaranteed to bomb catastrophically worldwide. High-ranking officials in the motion…
[ ![][2]][2] ‘Who put the condom in condominium?” asks avid reader Hugo Hefnerovich: more as an accusation than as a question. Despite the tone, the inquiry is worthy of further investigation, since the French inventor of the sheep gut prophylactic was a descendant of Rashi who had fled south from Troyes to the eponymous town…
[ ![][2]][2] LONDON — As excitement mounts for April’s upcoming International Facial Hair Festival in Götterdämmerung, Germany, organizers were delighted to announce a détente between the strong Pan-Muslim team, “Wahhabi Warriors,” and the much-fancied “Israel Right or Wrong” team. Brokered by Billy Gibbons, the lead singer of rock group ZZ Top, the groundbreaking deal will…
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